There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
