I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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