And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
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