My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
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