you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
