She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
