grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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