The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
