i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
zippers are such a cool invention
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
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