just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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