remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
