i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
