My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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