"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
