i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
