Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
