I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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