toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
