butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
