are you so shy because you have an std?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
