im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
