woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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