Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
