I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
