He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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