addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
