All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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