I can tuck mytits in my pants
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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