Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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