I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
