dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
