oh god the rape fog is back!
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
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