what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
