How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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