we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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