Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
