You can't special order awesome
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
