Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
