Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
This show inspires me to have sex in space
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
