Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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