We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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