even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
