so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
