That's intense
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Randomize
