i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
