OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize