I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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