i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
