I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
