Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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